New Beginnings

I know, I know, it's been nearly a year since my last post. I would give you a run down on what's happened in the last year but you'll probably hear about it in the Christmas card letter [assuming we get one out this year]. Besides, it will take too long anyway. Perhaps one of these days I'll be good and go back post, but for now we're just going to pick up right where we left off. You know, kind of like how the Spice Girls got reunited.



So in reality this post should be called "Stressed" or "Overwhelmed" because that is how I've been feeling lately, but I'm trying to look on the bright side. Some of you may know that our son Zachary was diagnosed with Bardet-Biedl Syndrome [check it out here]

http://www.rarediseases.org/search/rdbdetail_abstract.html?disname=Bardet%20Biedl%20Syndrome

His growth and development had been going well but in the last 6 months or so I noticed that he seemed to be more delayed than I cared to admit. He was evaluated by a speech pathologist who recommended a developmental evaluation. I always knew the wheels were turning in Zac's mind. I never doubted that he didn't understand enough for his age and as a result never worried too much how his condition would affect his intelligence. Zac's cognitive abilities were evaluated to be normal as I had expected. But his speech and motor skills were found to be quite delayed. What really threw me though was when the psychologist said he scored in the mild range on the autistic spectrum. As it turns out, those with Bardet-Biedl often times exhibit social and behavioral tendencies that are often mistaken for a mild autism. Needless to say, I am now in the process of securing services for Zac that include speech, physical and occupational therapy. You know, this wouldn't be that "overwhelming" if I wasn't also working from home as a property manager AND starting school full time at UCSD this week.



This week I really contemplated if going to school was the right thing for me to be doing right now. I mean, I know I need to finish school. It is important to me and important to Heavenly Father that I do so. My patriarchal blessing emphasizes this. So I guess it was the timing of it all that came into question. I truly had mixed feelings about it. I don't like the fact that I have to leave my kids to go to school and now with Zac and his special needs, how am I going to handle it all? My first trip to campus to get my ID card and books didn't help either. The UCSD campus is a concrete jungle with stretches of lawns, trees, trails and all sorts of greenery. As beautiful as it is and in one of my favorite parts of town no less [La Jolla anyone?], I couldn't help but feel very, very small.



Well you'll never believe how and when I got my answer. I was sitting in orientation for ERC [Elanor Roosevelt College] students and this lady got up to speak. I'll be honest, based on her appearance, I really thought she was dressed up like Eleanor Roosevelt to give us a convocation-like speech. Actually, she was the college provost. Ooops! She did end up delivering a convocation-like speech complete with metaphors about hot-air balloons and winds of opportunity. It was when she said to effect that "the university experience shapes, molds, and stretches us to help us learn and grow" when I got the answer I needed to hear. The sweet whispering of the Spirit spoke to my mind and heart: "That is why you are here." I still felt overwhelmed. In fact, I had to pretend yawn a couple times while I blinked back tears. But this overwhelming feeling was gratitude for a loving Heavenly Father who reveals His purpose for us and answers our prayers at times and in places least expected.



So this is my life right now. Stressed? Yes. Overwhelmed? You bet. Sweet? Absolutely. Life is so sweet...and full of new beginnings.